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 Jun 18 2007, 07:59 AM
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 doughnut who?  Group: Grumpy Auld Bastards Posts: 3784 Joined: 16-September 05 From: the burbs Member No.: 48334  |
Fall Classes for Men at THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED by Monday, Aug 30, 2007 NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM. Class 1 How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation. Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM. Class 2 The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself? Round Table Discussion. Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours. Class 3 Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice. Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours. Class 4 Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks. Class 5 Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink? Examples on Video. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM Class 6 Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other. Help Line Support and Support Groups. Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM Class 7 Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming. Open Forum. Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours. Class 8 Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health. Graphics and Audio Tapes. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. Class 9 Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined. Class 10 Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks? Driving Simulations. 4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours. Class 11 Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife. Online Classes and role-playing. Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined Class 12 How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion. Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM. Class 13 How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late. Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. Class 14 The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used. Live Demonstration. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined. Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors. This post has been edited by doughnutfairy: Jun 18 2007, 08:04 AM -------------------- "You and I are pretty much King and Queen of the dipshits." - Sampson
"I've read nothing in the Bible that disqualifies the possibility of the Christian God having other projects. He didn't tell us about them, so what? He didn't tell us about the internet, stuffed crust pizza, or guitar hero either but we figured that stuff out." - Scud |
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Jun 18 2007, 08:04 AM
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Group: TJNR Member Posts: 1182 Joined: 6-April 05 Member No.: 32627 |
These point out to me that I am not "masculine." Hell I even put the toilet paper on the right way.
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Jun 18 2007, 08:07 AM
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doughnut who? Group: Grumpy Auld Bastards Posts: 3784 Joined: 16-September 05 From: the burbs Member No.: 48334 |
QUOTE(Mael @ Jun 18 2007, 09:04 AM)  These point out to me that I am not "masculine." Hell I even put the toilet paper on the right way. It doesn't mean you're not masculine. It means someone trained you properly. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wink.gif) I actually could benefit from a few of these "courses" as well. Shopping, filling up ice cube trays, remembering important dates and asking for directions are not my thing. -------------------- "You and I are pretty much King and Queen of the dipshits." - Sampson
"I've read nothing in the Bible that disqualifies the possibility of the Christian God having other projects. He didn't tell us about them, so what? He didn't tell us about the internet, stuffed crust pizza, or guitar hero either but we figured that stuff out." - Scud |
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Jun 18 2007, 08:09 AM
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Group: TJNR Member Posts: 1182 Joined: 6-April 05 Member No.: 32627 |
QUOTE(doughnutfairy @ Jun 18 2007, 08:07 AM) QUOTE(Mael @ Jun 18 2007, 09:04 AM) These point out to me that I am not "masculine." Hell I even put the toilet paper on the right way. It doesn't mean you're not masculine. It means someone trained you properly. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wink.gif) I actually could benefit from a few of these "courses" as well. Shopping, filling up ice cube trays, remembering important dates and asking for directions are not my thing. Luckily I was trained by female friends before I ever dated. It has lead to its own problems though. I am too submissive 99% of the time. (Which gets read as indifferent or sulking/angry, go fucking figure.) Now if I only got paid for whoring myself out with something other then wooden nickles, I would be golden. |
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Jun 18 2007, 08:36 AM
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 Punch her apron one time for me, huh? Group: TJNR Member Posts: 5707 Joined: 22-December 04 From: _░▒▓█▓▒░_ Member No.: 18139 |
QUOTE(doughnutfairy @ Jun 18 2007, 08:59 AM) ... Class 6 Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other. Help Line Support and Support Groups. Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM ... Class 7 Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming. Open Forum. Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours. ... Class 10 Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks? Driving Simulations. 4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours. I guess I had a good mommy... These are the only ones I have trouble with. -------------------- QUOTE(The Ghost of B-Dub Pasts @ Feb 22 2010, 10:10 AM) Yes. Me thinks something is suspicious is afoot. |
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Jun 18 2007, 10:57 AM
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 I don't know, I'm making this up as I go Group: TJNR Member Posts: 1341 Joined: 14-August 06 From: Off to Malaysia Member No.: 68697 |
QUOTE(doughnutfairy @ Jun 18 2007, 02:59 PM) Fall Classes for Men at Class 3Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice. Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours. No. I am marking my terrority. All shall know me by my manly scent. Ug! -------------------- |
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Jun 18 2007, 09:01 PM
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 promoted from The Colonel Group: TJNR Member Posts: 3475 Joined: 16-June 04 From: East Coast - US Member No.: 14 |
This is how the Republic will be loss...not to an invading army, but the demasulaization and pussification of America's men.
Piss on the walls I say!!! -------------------- Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like? |
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Jun 18 2007, 10:03 PM
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 JUPITER'S COCK!  Group: Moderators Posts: 9617 Joined: 7-October 04 Member No.: 7642 |
QUOTE(The Colonel @ Jun 18 2007, 10:01 PM) This is how the Republic will be loss...not to an invading army, but the demasulaization and pussification of America's men. Piss on the walls I say!!! So we're gonna lose because men have to learnt o take care of themselves and their household? FOR SHAME! It's manly to not have to depend on someone all the time. And most of the other things are treating your partner like a person instead of an appliance. If you want the latter, they're called mail order brides. --------------------  I never update my section because I'm constantly jerking off to spaghetti breakfast porn. Once you go Crazy Demon Multi Penis, everything else is meh. |
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Jun 19 2007, 02:21 AM
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 BEAT THAT HORSE! Group: Grumpy Auld Bastards Posts: 36572 Joined: 8-July 09 From: --------> Member No.: 155186 |
QUOTE(doughnutfairy @ Jun 18 2007, 05:59 AM) Class 9 Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined. I was a map maker for years. I never need to ask. --------------------   |
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Jun 19 2007, 06:37 AM
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 Fasten then zip. You? Group: Grumpy Auld Bastards Posts: 4115 Joined: 23-November 04 From: A little left of center. Member No.: 13958 |
QUOTE(Wombat @ Jun 19 2007, 02:21 AM) QUOTE(doughnutfairy @ Jun 18 2007, 05:59 AM) Class 9 Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined. I was a map maker for years. I never need to ask. Crayons on the window do not count as a map. I actually do all those things, it's my wife that needs all those classes. --------------------  Cats the other other white meat. QUOTE(grey_fox24 @ Oct 24 2005, 01:00 PM) WHITE POWER!!! QUOTE(Thalia) Feel free to tell everyone I sent you pussy pics... |
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Jun 19 2007, 07:15 AM
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 I piss excellence.  Group: La Cosa Nostra Posts: 8368 Joined: 16-June 04 From: DF's Pants Member No.: 11 |
QUOTE(doughnutfairy @ Jun 18 2007, 08:59 AM) Class 4 Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks. Class 9 Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined. Class 10 Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks? Driving Simulations. 4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours. Only three I'm guilty of. Although, 1. The girl leaves more clothing around than I do. 2. Asking for directions is a sign of weakness. If you know what general direction you need to travel in, you will get there. 3. The girl can't parallel park. There have been a number of times when I've had to switch with her just so I could park the car. --------------------  Founder of the Anti-Drivel Consortium ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- GT69MSR: nighty night my little snuggle muffin of love GT69MSR: ;-) |
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Jun 19 2007, 03:17 PM
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 Uncle Mao = Borg Queen Group: TJNR Member Posts: 6448 Joined: 17-June 04 From: A chateau in France Member No.: 68 |
QUOTE(aezrael @ Jun 18 2007, 02:36 PM) Class 7 Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming. Open Forum. Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours. I can teach that in one simple line: Look BEHIND and UNDER other things, for goodness sake! -------------------- You're scared of mice and spiders, but oh-so-much greater is your fear that one day the two species will cross-breed to form an all-powerful race of mice-spiders, who will immobilize human beings in giant webs in order to steal cheese. |
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Jun 19 2007, 04:23 PM
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 College Football Guru Group: TJNR Member Posts: 868 Joined: 1-November 05 From: Tuscaloosa, Ala. Member No.: 51956 |
So dirty clothes can't be on the floor in the bathroom? Do they even make laundry hampers anymore?
-------------------- Theta Sigma |
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Jun 19 2007, 04:27 PM
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 Sleeping with the Enemy Group: Princess Posts: 16207 Joined: 19-July 04 From: Chicago Member No.: 2614 |
QUOTE(Thalia @ Jun 19 2007, 03:17 PM) QUOTE(aezrael @ Jun 18 2007, 02:36 PM) Class 7 Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming. Open Forum. Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours. I can teach that in one simple line: Look BEHIND and UNDER other things, for goodness sake! Oh my god no shit. A HUGE majority of the guys I know will stand in the middle of the room, and scream and yell that they've lost their keys. When I suggest they LOOK for them, they tell me they are. When I suggest like, lifting things up, or perhaps even MOVING from the spot in which they are standing, the place where absolutely positively the object they are searching for is NOT, they look at me like I suggested a solution involving quantum physics. -------------------- PMJ>All
Say My Name, Bitch.  AynSof: You lead a double life. In one, you are meek, mild mannered Clare who talks to me. In the other, you are evil dick-chopping Clarebitch who uses household implements to cause death. knievil the evil: your ass is more famous than 9 out of 10 world leaders WPxLeGeNd: you are my number one fluffer theonedroopy: men don't go through half the shit girls do, yet we act twice as retarded BigRich0161: remember, MEN ARE THE ENEMY DrGnFYRESPC34: id so blow a load on that pretty little face theonedroopy: You have the Helen of Troy of rumps. Brass: Clare: Champion of the Penis. DrGnFYRESPC34: I'm the great fucking communicator. |
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Jun 19 2007, 04:33 PM
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Uncle Mao = Borg Queen Group: TJNR Member Posts: 6448 Joined: 17-June 04 From: A chateau in France Member No.: 68 |
QUOTE(Husker @ Jun 19 2007, 10:23 PM) So dirty clothes can't be on the floor in the bathroom? Do they even make laundry hampers anymore? We have a lovely wicker one at my house, it maks you want to put things in it because it is so nice! Or maybe that's just me being weird, again. -------------------- You're scared of mice and spiders, but oh-so-much greater is your fear that one day the two species will cross-breed to form an all-powerful race of mice-spiders, who will immobilize human beings in giant webs in order to steal cheese. |
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Jun 19 2007, 04:37 PM
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 Stupid Fucking Newbie  Group: The Commission Posts: 12797 Joined: 26-July 04 From: Belfast \ Oslo Member No.: 2920 |
I know I'm old........ as well as being under suspicion of senility and over indulgence of alcohol products, but is someone suggesting there are two parts to a toilet seat?
--------------------  WALL TO WALL BASTARDS! AN ECUMENICAL MATTER ELOCUTION! KNICKERS! QUOTE(Clarissa @ Apr 10 2006, 10:56 PM) You're hotter than Sam you hot Irish hunk you. |
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Jun 20 2007, 09:56 AM
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 old school vitriol Group: TJNR Member Posts: 1195 Joined: 17-June 04 From: Illinois, USA Member No.: 126 |
All I have to say is, I'll give you the remote, when you watch TV that doesn't suck.
also if god wanted you to have the remote, you would already have it. This post has been edited by Nick Trod: Jun 20 2007, 09:57 AM -------------------- Avril Lavigne invented punk rock.
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Jun 20 2007, 12:25 PM
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#18
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College Football Guru Group: TJNR Member Posts: 868 Joined: 1-November 05 From: Tuscaloosa, Ala. Member No.: 51956 |
QUOTE(Thalia @ Jun 19 2007, 04:33 PM) QUOTE(Husker @ Jun 19 2007, 10:23 PM) So dirty clothes can't be on the floor in the bathroom? Do they even make laundry hampers anymore? We have a lovely wicker one at my house, it maks you want to put things in it because it is so nice! Or maybe that's just me being weird, again. See I don't have one. So my clothes just sit on the floor until its time to do laundry. Ofcourse when company is over, the clothes go into the laundry room to sit on the floor. -------------------- Theta Sigma |
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Jun 20 2007, 01:00 PM
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#19
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Uncle Mao = Borg Queen Group: TJNR Member Posts: 6448 Joined: 17-June 04 From: A chateau in France Member No.: 68 |
QUOTE(Husker @ Jun 20 2007, 06:25 PM) See I don't have one. So my clothes just sit on the floor until its time to do laundry. Ofcourse when company is over, the clothes go into the laundry room to sit on the floor. Well that's good enough for me- out of sight, out of mind! -------------------- You're scared of mice and spiders, but oh-so-much greater is your fear that one day the two species will cross-breed to form an all-powerful race of mice-spiders, who will immobilize human beings in giant webs in order to steal cheese. |
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Jun 20 2007, 01:05 PM
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#20
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Sleeping with the Enemy Group: Princess Posts: 16207 Joined: 19-July 04 From: Chicago Member No.: 2614 |
QUOTE(Nick Trod @ Jun 20 2007, 09:56 AM) also if god wanted you to have the remote, you would already have it. That may have been one of the funniest things you've ever posted. Mom approved. -------------------- PMJ>All
Say My Name, Bitch. AynSof: You lead a double life. In one, you are meek, mild mannered Clare who talks to me. In the other, you are evil dick-chopping Clarebitch who uses household implements to cause death. knievil the evil: your ass is more famous than 9 out of 10 world leaders WPxLeGeNd: you are my number one fluffer theonedroopy: men don't go through half the shit girls do, yet we act twice as retarded BigRich0161: remember, MEN ARE THE ENEMY DrGnFYRESPC34: id so blow a load on that pretty little face theonedroopy: You have the Helen of Troy of rumps. Brass: Clare: Champion of the Penis. DrGnFYRESPC34: I'm the great fucking communicator. |
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